Thursday, August 26, 2010

Memories... of being a SAHM

I'm cruising my blogroll and this post about the struggles of being a SAHM comes up from Leigh Ann, the author of Living with Three Hobbits and a Giant. How I remember those days...

I remember it was hard being a mom. I hated being stuck with little people all day, every day, 24/7. Stuck, being the operative word. No fuel, no extra money, and sometimes, no vehicle. Times are hard on a one income family, especially in a new town, far from family. We had recently moved to a really cute old house, with a fenced yard and nice neighbors. It was perfect, but I was miserably lonely. My then three and one year old kids were loud and needy. My 'alone time' in the morning was frequently interrupted. Dinner preparation usually needed more than the extra six arms I'd grown since giving birth. And my husband would come in from a 12 hr day, exhausted and barely able to follow my lengthy chatter.

Then, one day when I was particularly sour and trudging through the grocery story with 2 toddlers (one screaming and the other one crying), a sweet old lady passed me and said, "What a precious package you've got there!" She smiled widely and kept right on walking. I stopped and looked at my kids. Precious? These guys that drive me crazy are precious? They're misbehaving like crazy here! Precious? Really? Hmmm...

By the time I made it home, my outlook on being a SAHM was beginning to shift. I remembered my mother-in-law's advice when, while pregnant with the second child, I told her I could barely keep up with one kid - how was I ever going to handle two? She said, "God gives us grace for whatever comes." Indeed. Grace began to show itself as my perception altered. A package, the old lady had said. Like a gift. When I treated my boys like gifts, I smiled more readily. I wish I could say that I became the perfect mom. I can't. What I can say, though, is I was a happier mom which went a long way towards being a GOOD mom.

Now, my babies are nearly men. They don't pull at my knees or beg for my attention. We don't make cookies together anymore, or hang the wash out on the line together, or marvel over the baby birds in a new-found nest together. They don't cuddle up on the couch with me while I read anymore, or beg me to tell the story about when they were born. Those days are gone, and miss them so much.

While I go have myself a good cry, check out a couple of my favorite SAHM blogs:
Living with Three Hobbits and a Giant
Leigh Ann has such a sweet spirit that comes through in her writing. Her life makes me realize that my irritations were nothing more than little blips on a radar - really nothing at all. Thanks goes to you, my dear, for sharing your story.
ashleyann - Under the Sycamore
Ashley Ann takes some really gorgeous photographs! It's always such a pleasure to see her artistic flair a couple of times a week and encourages me to keep trying to snatch the occasional photo of my grown boys.

(The blogs and your very own little precious gifts!) ;)


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